Paris my love, Paris my fear

Today, Paris is in mourning. 
Yesterday was so disturbing. 

 I felt and still now fell that node in my stomach. My feelings are troubled, mashed into a giant black hole. I am lost. Lost in the incomprehension of a beautiful and harmful world. Full of pain and blood. How is it even imaginable that three simultaneous attacks happened in the heart of the capital city of France? Yes in the heart of Paris, in this democratic and free country. Last year I was one of the first explaining my distance between me and what happened to Charlie Hebdo. Explaining that the march was not in the name of freedom but in a manipulative media process f the world, showing their interests in front of our TV’s. But today is different. It is the drop of water that has made the vase overflow. And I am standing right here in front of all that bullshiters; yes they are not what they pretend to be. They are far from being world saviors for the humankind, the liberators from the capitalistic world that we live in. They are spreading blood and stupidity in this beautiful city. But they will not get what they want. They will not separate us, frightened us and make us hate each other’s. What I saw, read and understood is that they will never reach to that point. Because after all, the values stand in front of these people, these animals sorry. And together, nobody will hurt anyone; nobody will judge the black one, the Christian one, the Jewish one or the Muslim one. Because we are all soul in bodies, strong souls in ephemeral bodies made of bones, blood and water. It s not that we are equal, or even similar, we are different, there’s inequalities, injustices, bad stuffs over here, but we are human, and we have a heart that beats for the others. Because alone we are nothing. And together we are everything. Today what I know is that I never had this feeling of solidarity before. Especially with Parisians, known to be individualists and cold, they give their blood to help the injuries, they welcomed people in their houses and they have much more to give than these pseudo Muslims. Because Islam is about these values, solidarity, love, sharing not killing one another, with blind eyes, killing and making victims. Killers can hide as more as they can behind a mask. Whatever the mask is, it stills a mask. Behind Islam its easier because media feed everyday people to accept that distortions of reality. So at a point, it’s a strategic choice for murderers to choose Islam. But Islam will and does always reject them. As a Muslim my heart cries in tears and stretch. I fell pain and hate against these inhumanity. They got it all wrong.
 But we are gonna win.